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ANIMAÇÃO
OS MELHORES REMIX
ANIMAÇÃO
CONHEÇA JOSH BLUE
CACHORRO CONVERSADOR
UM RATO AO VIVO
MODELAGEM 3D
FALA SONHANDO QUE EU TE ESCUTO
MULHER NO VOLANTE
CHICO XAVIER
CALOPSITA ALARMANTE
QUANTO GANHA UM ASTRO DA NBA

CONHEÇA A VERDADEIRA DRA. LÚCIA SEXÓLOGA
TATUAGENS DOIDAS
GAMBIARRAS INTELIGENTES

POR QUE CÃES CHEIRAM RABOS
CONHEÇA SOMALY MAM
NOMES ESTRANHOS

Pô, Justin! A Rainha das Fadas queria ser você… Vira homem!

Quando ouvi o “Biba” cantando pela primeira vez, achei que fosse uma garota. Depois, eu o vi cantando, daí tive certeza.

Ia perguntar por que as adolescentes se apaixonam por um garoto que parece uma menininha de filme francês, mas acho que este post já foi o suficiente para colocar minha vida em risco…

Quick announcement:
I'm going to be appearing at the Schulz Museum in Santa Rosa California on Saturday afternoon, Sept 11, 2010. I'll be joining a metric buttload of other cartoonists from 1pm to 3pm for a sketch-a-thon, which means we sit behind tables and draw stuff for free or sign books or whatever, and then at 3:30pm, I'm doing a talk in the auditorium. It'll be fun, funny and FREE. Hope to see some of youse there.

P.S. Tell them you found out about it on this blog and it will be even MORE free.

WORD TO YOUR MOTHER

Bizarro is brought to you today by The Best 70 Bucks You'll Ever Spend.

So what's the deal with people who wear their sunglasses on the back of their head? Is this the logical extension of the backwards baseball cap? For me, both of these trends show a small glimpse of the the sort of utterly nonsensical behavior humans are uniquely known for. Baseball caps have bills on them to block the sun, so let's wear them backwards. Sunglasses were invented to protect our eyes, so let's put them on the back of our heads. Shoes exist to protect our feet, let's wear them on our hands. Or better yet, tie them to our belt and let them dangle from our waist. Non-human animals don't engage in this kind of behavior. Having a mutant, complex brain is a mixed bag, often leading us to do things we can't logically explain.

From the archives today we have a cannibal joke from 1999. There have been lots of puns about cannibals, my favorite being the clown in the giant cooking pot and a cannibal commenting that he "tastes funny." No idea who first did that, but it still makes me smile.

I've done other cannibal and primitive tribe cartoons and I've learned over the years that you have to be careful not to make them look African. This draws complaints from people who think you're advancing the racist stereotypes that black folks are more primitive than white. The best-known cannibals were mostly from the South Pacific, although it's been practiced from time to time by all kinds of cultures across the globe. The characters in my cartoon look pretty nondescript so I didn't get any angry letters.

A word of warning to any readers thinking of taking up the practice, cannibalism by any species leads to terminal dementia. Mad Cow Disease is the direct result of feeding ground-up cattle to cattle, for instance, which has been a money-saving practice of meat producers for some time. Some scientists believe that Alzheimer's Disease may be an offshoot from eating meat that has been raised that way, but it hasn't been proved.

The bottom line is, eating other people is probably okay on an occasional basis, but you wouldn't want to make a habit of it. Eating other species who ate their own is probably not a good idea, either.

Procurando novos artistas para as suas sandálias, a Havaianas fez uma parceria com o IdeaFixa e promoveu uma seleção via internet de centenas de trabalhos artísticos sob o tema “Cores Urbanas”. Foram 560 desenhos inscritos.


Os 50 trabalhos vencedores foram escolhidos por um júri formado por Marcello Serpa, sócio e diretor geral de criação da AlmapBBDO; Lilian Pacce, Editora de moda, apresentadora e jornalista; Janara Lopes, Sócia-fundadora e editora da IdeaFixa, Kátia Barros, diretora de criação da FARM e Rui Porto, consultor de Comunicação da Havaianas.

Mandei 3 desenhos, e...

TODOS foram selecionados!!
Cara, entrei querendo saber qual era o modelo escolhido.
Quando eu vi:
- olha tem outro!
- e ... Carajo! 

A reader of yesterday's blog post pointed me to this inspirational news story about "Cheesus". I hope your life is enriched by it as much as mine was.



And people ask me where I get my ideas for Bizarro.



.

More fighting and donuts.

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Piled Higher & Deeper by Jorge Cham		www.phdcomics.com
title: "You autumn leave" - originally published 9/1/2010 For the latest news in PHD Comics, CLICK HERE!

Bem, pessoal, estou aqui rapidamente para explicar pra vocês mais ou menos qual é a situação.

É o seguinte: como alguns de vocês mais chegados já sabem, estou desempregado. Estar desempregado é uma merda, porque tudo, TUDO que você tenta fazer, fica uma vozinha no seu ouvido dizendo "ei, não era bom você estar procurando emprego, não?"

E isso vem acontecendo comigo ultimamente. Sempre que eu paro pra pensar na próxima tirinha do Magias, vem uma voz na minha cabeça e me diz que ao invés de fazer tirinha, eu deveria me concentrar em arranjar um emprego.

Estou lutando arduamente contra esta vozinha. Mas enquanto minha situação está instável desse jeito, está difícil de me concentrar em inventar história e piada pro Oc, pro Remmil e pra Idana. Acreditem, estou tentando, mas a minha conta corrente não tem me dado muito sossego.

Bem, é isso. Espero conseguir atualizar o quanto antes, mas por enquanto a regularidade ainda não tá dando pra garantir, OK?

Podem deixar que, quando a tira nova sair, aviso a deus e o mundo no twitter, e-mail, nos fóruns e etc.


Agradeço a compreensão!


PS: se alguém souber de algum lugar que está precisando de um designer gráfico, diretor de arte ou similares, me dá um toque!

Tinha dado um tempo nas charges políticas, mas num dá, é maior do que ieu!

<— Inteiramente grátis, um emoticon do TaraDinho Maroto

SEXTA É DIA DE ILUSTRINHA. DESCE LÁ… se você for umA adolescente vai me odiar pra sempre

O que mais me impressiona nesse menino é o cabelo inabalável… Será que é peruca?

Bizarro is brought to you today by The Holy Family.

Today's theme is religion as all but the too-dense-to-be-reading-this-blog can easily see. As a vegan, I hate to promote any good news about cheese, but this pun was too much fun to pass up so I made an exception. If this were the shape of the folks who pester you at home you could answer the door with a giant cracker and scare the hell out of them.

Speaking of Hell, here's a ditty from the archives, from December of '96. This cartoon was requested by a friend who claims it as her favorite. She found it in my book, "Life is Strange and So Are You." It's out of print, as all my books are because you people don't buy enough books, but you can likely still find copies of it if you search online. Amazon may even have some.

This cartoon was from the time before I had learned to color my own work on computer, so I was doing it the old-fashioned way, which was to send the black and white version to the printer with elaborate numbers all over it telling them where to put various percentages of blue, red, yellow, and black. Coloring these things with numbers was an art form all it's own and you never knew what you were going to get until it came out in the paper. This one is ugly as hell, which is apropos. If I were doing it today, it would look so much better.

By the way, this depiction of "heck" is based on a visit to my grandparents' house. They suffered every day of their lives sitting on plastic-covered furniture, but when they died, it was as beautiful and new as the day it was bought. Praise Cheeses.

More neurology.

estou sem tempo pra desenhar como ja comentei no post anterior. também estava com um motne de ideia polemica ou ruim que ja estavam enterradas ha muito tempo. pois bem, entao eu juntei o util ao agradavel e to tentando convencer vocês que quantidade é melhor que qualidade. olha só quatro tiras num dia, porra fenomenal ne. amanha, sem falta, algo que preste. ou pelo menos com essa intençao. bjos seus bando de gente legal!

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Bizarro is brought to you today by Vacation Surprises.

Here are three jokes I really like; two new ones and one from 1998.

The basic idea for the baboon joke was sent to me by a reader. I really wish I'd thought of it. So perfect. My wife, CHNW, had heart surgery when she was 20 because one of her valves had been eaten away by a random infection. She needed to have the valve replaced and was offered either a mechanical one or a pig's valve. As regular readers know, she's an avid animal rights activist so you can imagine her response to the pig valve. She got a mechanical one, of course, and now ticks like a clock. When it's really quiet, you can actually hear it.

"Whack-A-Mirror" is based on the popular "Whack-A-Mole" arcade game. I love the self-loathing aspect. Not sure why, I guess because I hate myself sometimes. Don't we all? Please tell me you hate yourself sometimes, I don't want to be the only one. That would give me more reason to hate myself.

This final gag from the archives of Bizarro International Headquaters is a longtime fave of mine. I've seen a few takes on the "I can take that for you if you'd like to be in it" phenomenon, but this is among my favorites. In those days, I used to draw TONS of background on almost every cartoon. I do less of that now because I already work too many hours and the joke is the same either way. Even still, I draw more backgrounds than 99% of cartoonists, so I don't feel so bad. No mirror-whacking for me today.

Update: For those who wanted to see angry ferrets get juggled, here’s a quick doodle.

And here are more chainsaws.

É, Caco! Se tivesse assistido Indiana Jones, saberia disso.

...essa deu origem a "Rui" (folhateen)

fiquem com essa montagem superlegal enquanto não rola tempo pra eu desenhar.

aliás, fonte das imagens = google imagens

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Piled Higher & Deeper by Jorge Cham		www.phdcomics.com
title: "Lab Coat Rack" - originally published 8/30/2010 For the latest news in PHD Comics, CLICK HERE!

Antes mesmo do mentirinhas existir, fiz um projeto com o Arthur do underflash – que agora esta perdido em algum lugar da Australia – coalizando alguns blogueiros. Hoje, com certeza, eu teria colocado mais alguns… mas quem sabe eu não faça um upgrade. Identificou algum?

...essa saiu no tempo da Copa, mas - ué! Ainda vale.

Interrompemos a programação para a apresentação…

Se eu chego no céu e encontro o Chimbinha… Sou capaz de pegar o elevador lá pra baixo

Ah, hoje é dia do blog, então, postei um projeto antigo – caricablogs – desce lá na ilustrona.

Bizarro is brought to you today by the 11th Commandment.

I'm back from my vacation and gosh darn it's good to see you. If I discover any cool pics from my trip, I'll be sure to post them. Just went to Florida to hang out with CHNW's dad, though, so it was pretty chill. It's really rare that I can sit around for a few days and do nothing.

I have a business trip out west next week, so I'm really slammed with deadlines. In addition to my regular unrelenting 7-cartoons-a-week schedule, I've got to do a book cover for my upcoming "Bizarro Heroes" book, which will be full of cartoons about super heroes and caped crime fighters of all kinds. I'm also supposed to do a promotional cartoon for a charity thing that King Features is doing and a couple of other things I can't recall right now. Guess I should have been writing these things down.

To some people, the life of a syndicated cartoonist may seem glamorous and fun, and it certainly can be, but I regularly work 7 days a week, at least 8 hours a day. It wears on me, just like any other job would. And no matter how stressed or tired I am, I have to come up with enough funny ideas to fill every day of my life until I retire. Just typing that sentence made my stomach hurt.

This cartoon about the couple arose recently when I found out about "speed dating." It's a real deal that people do, look it up. It makes sense in an odd, unnatural way, because all relationships play out to an end at some point, some sooner than later. Might as well get it over with, I suppose. What I've done here is to compress what usually takes a year or more into four sentences. If you can get a relationship past numbers one and two and still find some joy in it, you can avoid number four. Sometimes.

This old cartoon from my archives is one that has seriously dated itself. When I drew it, in 1996, people still carried "beepers." (More accurately called "pagers.") People under a certain age won't even know what those were. I thought I'd be happy to see them go because the beeping was an annoyance, but the electronic-super-fly-disco ringtones of today are even worse in my opinion.

Sorry to be a bit of a downer today. I'm overwhelmed with re-entry. Ugh.

Bizarro is brought to you today by Important Information.

One day I was tweeting something and I thought it might be fun to open up a new Twitter account under the name "God" and tweet stuff like this. The name had already been taken, of course, probably about 18 seconds after Twitter was invented. I don't follow God on Twitter so I can't say what he/she is using it for. Other examples of what I might have tweeted as God:

Just cured a guy of leprosy, gave about 7 million other people cancer.

I could stop wars anytime I want but without cable, what would I watch?

Dave, if you're going to cheat on your wife, I'm going to introduce her to a hot trainer at the gym.

Hurricane Katrina wasn't about the iniquities of New Orleans. I was trying to teach you how to build a decent levee.

No prayers this weekend, please, I'm taking some time off.

My ancient cartoon for the day is from February of 1996. I've done a number of satires of Family Circus over the years, as have lots of other cartoonists, and I should mention that Bil Keane is a great sport about it. The first time I did it, he called me the next day (scaring me to death) and asked for the original art for his collection. I traded it to him for a Sunday panel of FC, one in which the dead grandpa ghost appears. Bil even used my name in his cartoon one time. If my archives were arranged in a way that I could find anything specific, I'd post it here. It was a picture of Billy and Jeffy talking to each other with their dad in the background listening. Billy says, "The Piraro's dad wears gold chains and an earring, all our dad wears is glasses and deodorant."

I have never worn a gold chain in my life, but I do have earrings. Still, it was fun to be a part of Family Circus.

More technology.

Recebi do Ciência do Humor!

Envio para:
Tirinhas da Comédia
Vírus Pervertido
Tirinhas do BL

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SEBO NAS CANELAS, MANOLO BURRO!!!!!

Happy Birthday Karina! Here’s hoping you feel a little bit wiser today!

Five years ago, Karina asked me for a birthday cartoon, and I’ve been helping her celebrate ever since. Here are her other birthday cartoons: 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5

And I’d like to also wish a happy birthday to readers AndyinSDCA, Diana, Luv2Fli2, Noa, Shawna, and Vanessa; and to fellow cartoonist Mike Bannon!

já votaram pro RyotIRAS no blogBOOKS hoje?

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Piled Higher & Deeper by Jorge Cham		www.phdcomics.com
title: "Stylin'" - originally published 8/27/2010 For the latest news in PHD Comics, CLICK HERE!

Eita! Tem que furar é?! Ah, então vou fazer de rena… se não machucar o bichinho, claro.